Quitting: Day three and Four!

I've got a 24 hr delay thing happening with my posts thanks to a dodgy internet connection on my iPad but let's hope I have it working now!

So Day three was surprisingly easy.  I had a few moments but that constant edginess of the first 24hrs was gone completely.. Until bedtime!  I used Valium to sleep again but woke up quite early feeling great!

Day four was even better with no cravings at all really... Just a general feeling do missing something.  It's all head work from here on out so it's time to put away the food!  Lol. Yes, I've been a little snacky at night!

My reading tells me it can be a while before my brain chemistry adjusts to the changes, 3-4 weeks apparently but I'm ready.  I know my excuses and weaknesses and have my answers and rebuttles to make sure I win!  

I'm an ex smoker.. Time to start living again!

Quitting: Day 2

I've made it 24hrs and I tell ya, no where near as bad as I thought.

I'm a bit antsy, teeth grindy, and a bit over expressive with a tendency toward utter fatigue!  That of course makes perfect sense.  NOT!  Nothing like bit of contridiction! I did get sleep last night but also had a Valium and was waking from 4am onwards!

My sore throat and allergies from the weekend have cleared up and the stinky smell is all gone.  I still have a slight yuk taste in my mouth but it's getting better.

Things that have helped so far... Breathing techniques have come in handy, just to take off the edge, and I am very glad I haven't had too much caffeine either - just one coffee this morning and I've had a few mouthfuls of tea this afternoon.  Water was great this morning, but I've resorted to M&Ms right now!  Lol Both seem to give my mouth something to do to relieve the aggravation.  I've kept up my food, including some fruit juice to try and keep my blood sugar as stable as possible ( these M&Ms won't help but hey, they are yummy!).

I think the funniest thing is the psychological game I'm playing with hubby...  I've been dancing round acting like I'm completely normal, saying patches are for pussies and bragging that I've quit and it's so easy - and he is convinced I've got a packet stashed somewhere!  It's keeping him motivated because he wants to 'win' and by pretending to be all blasé and cool about quitting, I'm believing it which is making it 100% easier!

Negatives... I'm still battling occasionally with the 'but I want to smoke' thoughts every now and then.  I'm beginning to see through them as my brain trying to rationalise the need to relieve the tension it feels.  I'm hoping this feeling starts to ease now.  I am dreading that it might get worse!  I'm sure I've read Day 3 is the worst but I guess I still have 24hrs before I hit that!  

Looking forward to moving on and doing my budget without any smokes to buy!

Quitting: Day 1

I've just run out of smokes and don't have the money to buy more.  Well, I do, but not without breaking my budget - more then it already has been broken.

So that's it.  Two hours in and I'm already hitting the 'want a smoke' stage - a general agitation, tightness of the chest, metallic taste in my mouth type feeling.

The reason I want to smoke... To relieve that agitation and physical symptoms created by the last cigarette, and my perception that it somehow evokes relaxation.

The reason I don't want to smoke... It's damn expensive, can't afford it, tastes like shit, smoke gets into my eyes, it takes over my thoughts, reduces concentration and focus, makes my finger nails yellow and my hair yucky, I feel greasy smelly and dirty, sucks up all my time, keeps me up all night, ruins my lungs making running hard, I use it as an excuse to not exercise, and then there are the health risks as well.

Seems like a no-brainer right?  But fear is a strong motivator and it's amazing the lengths one will go to to avoid the discomfit of even the mild anxiety of nicotine withdrawels.

Roadblocks...

I have lots of excuses to use as roadblocks.  Stress, visiting family, spouse smoking, etc.  right now is as good a time as any... No money to buy smokes, husband has patches to quit (which I can fall back on if needed), I have some Valium on prescription for anxiety if it gets too much, and the weather is cold and wet or stinking bloody hot - both good reasons to not go outside for a smoke!

Things to help...

I have to acknowledge that there will be times when I get overwhelmed with the 'need' to smoke, when my mind starts trying to play tricks on me.  When I start trying to manipulate my husband into buying smokes, when I think about sneaking out for just one.. knowing it will happen and recognising it for what it is makes it harder to deceive myself.

For physical symptoms:

*Ensuring I eat properly and stay hydrated will help with 'hunger' type feelings and stop me ballooning in weight.

*Cutting out the coffee will help reduce agitation - nicotine dulls the effects of caffeine so you can become more sensitive to it.

*Eat fruit for snacks, or drink juice to maintain blood sugar levels.  Nicotine affects your blood sugar levels so you can experience sugar crashes along with cravings!  This is apparently why people gain weight when quitting (along with the whole oral fixation thing!).

*breathing exercises can help replace the process of smoking - three deep slow breathes with a hold before releasing can mimic the supposed relaxation response.

*distraction is always good - exercise, Candy Crush, housework, a shower, brush teeth, chew gum, watch a movie, go shopping (anywhere non-smoking), even making a phone call.  The less the act is associated with smoking the better, the places you can't smoke (or buy them) are better still.  

*boredom is my biggest enemy so I need to balance distraction and activity with a steady input of relaxation as well.

*and my last resort will be the Valium.  I've quit smoking before without nicotine replacements but I found it so hard to sleep, and then fatigued the next day, and fearful of another bad nights sleep I caved at the next opportunity.

I believe I am prepared.  I'm feeling great, but thinking I might brush my teeth.  I've downed a good litre of water and feeling a bit sleepy.

Budgeting Baby Steps: Adaptation

While not a Baby Step in itself, adaptation is a key factor in the success of your budget. Not only in adapting to inflatation, errors in estimations, unexpected blow outs on certain bills (no, kids YouTube is not free on the mobile phone!), but also for its application in real life.

Only a week in and I am ready to make some changes!

From BabyStep 1, where I learnt to manage my everyday living through a Cash Envelope Budget, I've already seen ways to simplify this.  The Speech therapy issue has been nagging me, I hate having that cash there for a month, and now that I will have to rely on Medicare rebates after paying the full amount, it just seems easier to go to EFTPOS to do this - that way the rebate can be deposited into the same place as the payment came out without affecting my cash flow.  So speech is now part of my Bills Account. 

From BabyStep 2, I mentioned that getting the Bills account to balance after the big bills is the hardest part and even with the complex spreadsheeting I wasn't really confident with my Cashflow.  This account I would eventually like to running a month in advance but I've been ignoring one glaringly obvious glitch in the system.  While most of my bills are monthly, a couple are fortnightly, and a few are quarterly.  I will no doubt end up with some yearly ones in there too.  The thing is, I'm trying to meld three different time zones into the one account.  I want to keep it simple, but I do need to find some way, at least until I get a full quarter saving for each of my quarterly bills, to account for the fact that while a bill may be quarterly, I only have a few weeks to save for it!  I think the simplest way to do that is to just go back to where I calculated the monthly and fortnightly amounts for my bills and re-do my quarterlys to reflect the time left to pay them, rather then the full quarter.  It means I will have to readjust  when I pay the next bill for each of them but it's hardly a drama.

I think I am beginning to understand that my Babysteps are going to become a repeating system of checks on my budget to manage and improve my finances.  Well, at least the first few which focus on the budget!

I'm also really becoming acutely aware that I need to quickly implement a savings aspect to my budget.  DH announced we need a new Frypan, DS1 requires non-subsidised medicine, and Mum invited us down for a weekend.  Not to mention birthdays coming up, and my anniversery, and Christmas.  And to top it all off, the Dryer started pouring out smoke!  So yes, a savings account is next on the plan!

UPDATE:  I went ahead with implementing these changes but when I put pen to paper (or mouse to spreadsheet in this case), it just didn't work.  I've decided to total my Cashflow at the end of each pay period (a running total would be better but too much hassle and too messy to put in) or before each transfer into the account.  That way I can check for any negative balances.  Electricity is my biggest bill and is at the end of the three month budget so that should work out.  It's not perfect, but it will work out!

Day 19 & 20: Slowing Down!

  I'm losing momentum a little here, but I am confident the basics are there and it is purely a sense of perfectionism that is telling me I'm not keeping up!  Keeping up with what?  No-one said the 31 Babysteps HAD to be done consecutively, or that I even had to blog everyday about it.  I'm moving toward my goal, and the slower the better!  The better I build this foundation the stronger it will be!

DAY 19

I've been making my bed each morning, decluttered a little in my closet, and for Day 19 we got to read one of the classic Flaylady emails... The one about staying in a gorgeous sounding B&B, which is, of course, their home.  I guess the premise is that housework isn't so much a chore, but an opportunity to pamper yourself with a freshly made bed, or your family with a set table and home cooked meal and fun planned weekend instead the mad rush cleaning catch up session which always seems to involve yelling at someone!  Who would think of a chore as a way to spoil yourself?  But seriously, nothing beats a made bed with a sprinkle of talc between the sheets and some fluffed up pillows!  And I do love being my own cleaning fairy so I wake up to a clean kitchen so I can make lunches and cook breakfast!

I guess it all comes down to attitude, and while I'm not quite at the 'Blessing my family" stage, I am willing to acknowledge that life is easier and better for everyone (including myself) when I do just a few basic bits of housework and take a little pride in my work!

DAY 20

It's time to add laundry to the routine, in the morning and at night.  I like how my dishwasher works, with turning it on in at night and emptying in the morning, but with the washing machine I'm going to attempt to fill it each night, get Dave to turn it on when he wakes up, and then hang it out just before I take the kids to school.  Then I can bring in, fold and put away (or iron) in the afternoon.  Perfectionism aside, I just need to check on my laundry morning and night and make sure something is happening with it.  I randomly have to wash sheets too which could easily throw off any attempt at perfection!

It's kind of coincidental that the dryer chose this week to blow up - well, it didn't blow up, it started smoking.  DH and myself pulled the back off and de-fluffed it and it ran okay without clothes, but I think I will leave it outside for now and maybe even get rid of it.  A dryer isn't a necessity at the moment and it's not worth the repair money for a poorly designed one that blows fluff everywhere!

I also think its time to de-clutter my routine.  I'm not sure if I like using an app even, I can't quite pin down what it is, but my routines are getting automatic and having to tick off a checklist is more annoying then helpful.  But that might be ego thinking I'm better then the system!  Anyway, I need to update my routines with laundry check so I might write a copy of it on a post it note to stick around the house.